13 Goons

In Which They Find a Hat

Traveling deeper into the unknown, our party find themselves in the depths of hell itself after a rather abrupt transition from the dark cave they were just getting comfortable with. Upon crossing the threshold into this newly discovered miniature hellhole, they quickly realize two things. One, it’s rather hot in hell. Even more so than you’ve been lead to believe. Two, there was a large number of angry looking orcs all staring directly at them.

It appears the group had interrupted an important looking ritual involving a pool of blood, a dark and likely evil sorcerer, and a rumpled grey hat. Wait! A grey hat? That could only be the fabled magic hat they were sent to find. And the orcs were using it’s magic to spawn more of their kind, which was a blasphemy our heroes were not going to abide.

Charging valiantly into battle, the party quickly gains the upper hand on the newly risen orcs. It was only a matter of time before all the orcs were slain, most unceremoniously kicked into the molten lava. Triumphant, they stride forward to investigate the spoils of their victory, ensuring there are no latent traps guarding the hat (as all good adventurers do). Sarik, confident in his own importance to the universe, snatched up the hat and placed it upon his head.

“I am Malefagor, the All-Knowing” boomed a new voice in his head. “I will provide two services to whoever currently wears me. First, I can rescue you from nearly any calamity or predicament you find yourself in by teleporting you away. However, I have no control over our destination. Also, it takes great amounts of energy to perform this feat, so do not expect saving from every worry and trouble you get yourself into.”

“Second, each day, I shall offer the following bargain. Place me upon the head of a sentient being so that I may learn more about this world. If I find the new subject interesting, I will reward you by allowing you to ask me one to three questions answered from my vast sums of knowledge.”

Whilst Sarik ponders the implications of his new friend, a rather large demon crashes up from underneath the rocks they had been standing on. It seemed that the chief resident of this hellhole had returned and was not in the mood to entertain guests. And once again, our group flung themselves into battle to save themselves from being eaten by a very nasty monster. And what a battle it was! No mere skirmish, the group dig deep into their reserves as they find themselves beaten about by the demon. With the outcome looking grim and his allies on the brink of death, Sarik musters up one final bolt of lightning that just manages to lay the demon low.

As they catch their breath, Kinich and Belkas find themselves infected with demonic plagues. Kinich was the luckier of the pair, with only a filthy fever to worry about. Belkas, however, had come down with the Red Fever, a disease strong enough to cause hallucinations and confusion even in the midst of a pitched battle. The party quickly makes its way to the surface, lest any new demons swing by. Once clear of the cave, Kinich reaches out his senses, looking for any nearby source of divine energy, hoping to find a priest who could cure them of their diseases. As luck would have it, he detected a large source of the stuff only a few days travel south-west. Setting off into the desert, magical hat in tow, the group remains optimistic of their fortunes, as with all naive heroes. How could they know they would soon be faced with the wrath of an angry god, freed from his prison?

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